[at-l] Cohos, rhymes with go-homes Re: No regrets...

[Jim Bullard]

Maybe it would be easier in winter then, what with all that water being
frozen. :-)

Jim Bullard
http://jims-ramblings.blogspot.com/
http://members.photoportfolios.net/Jim_Bullard
http://www.photoshelter.com/c/jim_bullard


On Wed, Dec 23, 2009 at 4:12 PM, Tom McGinnis <sloetoe at yahoo.com> wrote:

> --- On Mon, 12/21/09, Mark Hudson <mvhudson at gmail.com> wrote:
> > For penance I think we should send Sloetoe
> > off to do the first winter thru of the Cohos Trail! :-)
> > I don't think it's been done yet... and he
> > wouldn't get rained on <lol!>
> >
> > skeeter
> >
> >
> ### Ohmygawd, aren't you the ROYAL clown! I nearly splurched this morning's
> coffee all over when I read that. That was truly a ROTFLMAO. Ohmigod. Huge.
> Huge!
>
> ###
> This was a sloetoe & sons BAIL of the highest order. TOTAL fail (okay, NEAR
> total fail) of EPIC proportion. It was so wet that one son's feet
> DELAMINATED -- yes -- whole layers of skin sought to drop off his feet --
> outrageously painful, and there was NOTHING I could do about it -- not as
> father, not as hiker, nuttin'. It was pouring rain, fergawdsake!
>
> ### The trail was a rude trick -- a rumor put together with a lie. The
> Cohos runs from the Canadian Border south to the Whites, crossing the
> Presidentials near Eisenhower/Pierce and thence south through the
> Pemigawasett. But what was on the map as completed would lead you on the
> primrose path and then savage you like some vegetable killer from the Isle
> of Dr. Moreau. Snow mobile trails that traversed bogs and moose wallows in
> winter were completely under water in summer -- days of black water up to
> our hips, weeds over our heads, and mosquitoes unlike ANY primeval hoard I
> had ever experienced. You didn't have time to swat them -- you could only
> smear them in a constant dual-armed motion WAY too close to some nervous
> twitch for comfort.
>
> ### Our best time (mileage AND enjoyment-wise) came when simply, FINALLY,
> ignoring the frggn MAP and heading cross-country, through the puckerbrush
> (as it's called), hitting the geographic highlights in a VAGUE attempt to be
> faithful to a trail that had abused us again and again. The less we paid
> attention to the map (and physical route before us), and more to "where
> would we go, if we wanted to go THERE (pointing out at the horizon), and
> wanted to get there roughly.... this way" -- the easier AND more enjoyable,
> the hike got.
>
> ### But it was too late. Bug's boots (the "Spongeboot") had bathed his feet
> in water for two solid weeks, I think, and one day, 10 miles from Dixville
> Notch and nearly within sight of The Balsams
> http://www.thebalsams.com/ as we're going up one of the bigger, steeper
> mountains, in a now-pouring rainstorm, the skin on Connor's feet gave out.
> He screams like he'd sliced both feet open lengthwise on blades -- he can't
> move. Now, this kid is tough, and for him to *scream* like that, I knew
> there was something major going on.
>
> ### In the pouring rain, try to shelter under a tree just off the ski trail
> we're climbing up. We peel off his gaiters and boot and sock, and there's
> his foot, flapping like someone had wrapped the sole in a cellophane layer
> -- him screaming with hot tears at each flutter. And NOTHING I could do.
>
> ### Somehow, in one of the bigger demonstrations of grit and quiet
> determination that I have EVER witnessed in my life, the kid, now reshorn
> and re-gaitered, puts on his pack, and gingerly commences back uphill.
>
> ### OH, BUT I FORGOT TO TELL YA! At the BASE of this very hill, not mile
> before Connor's foot flapped, I'd pulled them over (so to speak) and said
> "Look guys, now, you know me, and I'm now quitter. [Nods from both boys.]
> And I know *you* guys are no quitters. [They trade a blank look with each
> other.] But this trail has been a lie, and there've been blased parts not on
> the map, and mapped routes that don't exist, and the *best* progress we've
> made is by NOT being faithful to the trail, and humping away where we
> choose. [Nods of agreement.] I know it means you won't get that spot on the
> [old] website for "First Thru-hikers Age 12-under", but I think we've been
> had, and what was supposed to be a warm-up for our AT hike is, I GUARANTEE
> you, MUCH tougher than heading out of Pinkham Notch right now. [Two glimmers
> of hope] I say we quit this crap, and head to the AT RIGHT NOW. [Silent
> YES!] I say we get to Dixville Notch and GO. ["Yes! Ah-huh! Absolutely!"]
>
> ### They were all over that idea -- the "Cohos Trail" could wait, entirely
> were it was -- it was impeding a much more important agenda, to which it was
> supposed to be only ancillary. Screw that. Ten minutes later, Connor's foot
> flappes out. GAWD!
>
> ### So we trudge up the mountain, and down the mountain, in steady,
> every-wettening rain. We get lost in the ski-maze of The Balsams alpine
> slopes (each steep because, after all, it's *alpine*), but keep heading
> generally southwestish, and come out where we need to. Which was a hoot.
>
> ### It's 10:00pm at night, we've been trudging without a break since at
> least 6pm if not sooner. We're covered in mud, soaking wet, and
> near-delirious with exhaustion, clothed in baseball caps, open parka shells,
> shorts and those gaiters -- and the ONLY thing that keeps us going is the
> promise of the car. The car. The car. Food, dryness, rest. The car.
>
> ### When we hit The Balsam's parking lot, leaden legs, grime faces, mud to
> the tops of our knee-high gaiters, we were still a long trudge to the car,
> on the other side of Dixville Notch. I told the boys, "What this. This is
> what *hospitality* is all about." We walked into the luxury and warmth and
> comfort, and were nearly bowled over. I spied the concierge on the other
> side of the lobby (who definitely spied us), but to get there, I had to wait
> while whole trains of families -- sport coats and ties, dresses and skirts,
> down to the smallest members, trooped past us and on into some sort of
> "Bingo Cave" soiré -- them staring at us (with horror and some strange glint
> of jealousy), us staring back, horrified and jealous the same.... What a
> moment.
>
> ### So I am able to hiker-shuffle over to the concierge, present him our
> situation, and ask him a favor. The boys, dripping less but looking all the
> more waif-ish, are now in front of him, looking up with big, big eyes.
> "Could we get a ride across the Notch to our car," I askes. "Immediately,"
> comes the answer. I turned to the boys, "Told ya." I said loudly enough to
> have the concierge hear me, "Hospitality is serious business here. A long
> tradition..."
>
> ### The epilogue? The boys were so tired that they consumed no food -- an
> Oreo was famously half-eaten in one boy's hand. I had to pull over twice on
> the short-ish drive to south to Gorham, to stand in the cold and do jumping
> jacks. We arrived at Hiker's Paradise around midnight to find the second
> floor hostel alive with activity, but the downstairs darkened and not
> answering. So we made ourselves at home as best we could, moving out the
> next day when HP's owners attacked (when I tried to pay). We spent the next
> two days pumping Connor full of Vitamin E and such, and planning our food
> drops from Pinkham to Katahdin. And some 4-ish weeks later, were denied
> Katahdin by Nesowadnehunk flooding from Hurricane Bonnie. (Truly scary
> stuff.)
>
> Wowwwwww.
> Ooop. Got to go.
>
> Cohos. REALLYYYYY FUNNY, SKEETER.
> Holy crap, that cracked me up.
> And skeeter told us that had we gone even to Dixville Notch, that the trail
> improved markedly from there south. WONDERFUL.
> But, EPIC fail. Though no trail will EVER catch us like that again. So, big
> and positive lessons learned, and also, the memory of that kid, standing
> back up with flapping foot-flesh, and not saying a word about it for the
> rest of the day!!! How could he DO that??? And then it just re-attached
> itself! Within 48 hours, he was good to go! HOW?!? {Vitamin E is how.)) At
> the time, I remember calling Connor a hero -- and now 5 years later, I still
> stand in awe.
>
> "Quit?"
> Not without a fight.
> _______________________________________________
> at-l mailing list
> at-l at backcountry.net
> http://mailman.backcountry.net/mailman/listinfo/at-l
>
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: http://patsy.hack.net/pipermail/at-l/attachments/20091223/b4856836/attachment.html