[pct-l] Waaay Off Topic -- was The Long Suffering Mrs. Switchback

Wed Dec 12 05:02:21 CST 2007

This post will be responded to off list.  Anyone wishing to follow the discussion (or participate in it)  can email myself or Donna personally for copies of the communications.

"Donna \"L-Rod\" Saufley" <dsaufley at sprynet.com> wrote:  body{font-family: Geneva,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:9pt;background-color: #ffffff;color: black;}   Warning:  this post is not PCT related -- though it does have a tie-in to hosting hikers. 
 Gail,
 I do know what you're saying; one only has to look at any cult (i.e., Warren Jeff's crew) to observe those who have lost perspective on their own (and their children's) well-being.  However, there are many more mental, emotional, and financial dynamics at play in battered women's syndrome than merely a belief in platitudes.  I know this too well because long ago in another lifetime I was one, like too many others. Thankfully I did not wind up like Nicole Simpson or other such statistics.  There were a laundry list of reasons I found myself in this situation back when, but indoctrination in verse was not one of them.  In fact, it was turning to the wisdom of ages found in these words that led me out of personal hell and turned my life around for the better. The same guidance ultimately changed the attitudes and life of the abuser for the better too. 
 Personally, I believe the world would be a better place if people did embrace such noble aspirations in human interactions -- to be loving, patient, kind, and forgiving.  It is that very belief that allows me to open my home to complete strangers. I'm not saying that I've perfected anything in any way, but I will say that the rewards of simply trying to live by these tenets have been deeply satisfying, and it is what I want the rest of my life to be about. Love is the cure for what ails us, not the cause.
 Anyways, this for me is an interesting conversation, though it probably belongs off post.  If continued, should be continued there, I think. Of course, I mean that in a very loving way!!
 L-Rod

 -----Original Message----- 
From: g l 
Sent: Dec 9, 2007 6:24 PM 
To: Donna Saufley , PCT 

Subject: RE: [pct-l] The Long Suffering Mrs. Switchback 

Yes, you're correct.  It isn't love FROM THE ABUSER.  But it IS possible for a person (usually women) to "love" an abuser and feel they have to stay in the situation because of platitudes they've been led to believe in.  

Donna Saufley <dsaufley at sprynet.com> wrote:  
  v\:* {behavior:url(#default#VML);} o\:* {behavior:url(#default#VML);} w\:* {behavior:url(#default#VML);} .shape {behavior:url(#default#VML);}    st1\:*{behavior:url(#default#ieooui) }        I answer than if it involves abuse, it isn’t love at all, but something else.

---------------------------------

 From: g l [mailto:gailpl2003 at yahoo.com] 
Sent: Sunday, December 09, 2007 10:55 AM
To: Donna L-Rod Saufley; PCT
Subject: Re: [pct-l] The Long Suffering Mrs. Switchback

 Better be careful with that one Donna.  It sounds good in theory, but women who subscribe to that philosophy may wind up abused or worse..........

A healthy "love of self" has to factor in too..........
Love does NOT bear ALL things....

I know this was posted in response to a humorous thread, but "quaint and pat philosophies" can be dangerous.  Just ask Nicole Brown Simpson.......

Another famous Ed Abbey quote:  "God is love?  Not bloody likely!!"

And since this is waaaayyyyy OT, I'll leave it at that.

Gail

"Donna \"L-Rod\" Saufley" <dsaufley at sprynet.com> wrote:
 Love is patient; love is kind. Love bears all things.

-----Original Message-----
>From: Jeffrey Olson 
>Sent: Dec 8, 2007 4:40 PM
>To: "pct-l at backcountry.net" 

>Subject: Re: [pct-l] The Long Suffering Mrs. Switchback
>
>I'm sure this story has little parallel or metaphorical value, but
>because I'm in a motel in Rapid City, SD waiting to take a flight out
>to the bay area tomorrow in the AM, I feel like writing...
>
>I spent thanksgiving with someone else's family. The grandfather, Herb,
>73 years old, talked nonstop. He owned two Studebakers, was a
>past-president of the local Studebaker club, owned a body shop for 40
>years, and had one story after another, and no sign of ever getting
>tired of talking about what interests him. As the low man on the family
>totem pole - a guest, not family - I spent 70% of my time with him.
>
>Two of three of his kids were there. The son spent the whole of
>thanksgiving social time in the garage working on his sister's car. 
>The daughter took her small dogs for four or five walks "so they could
>do their business." The son's wife helped in the kitchen, but she was
>recovering from cancer and had a really depressed affect.
>
>My friend, her mom and sister hung out and added weight to the family's
>time together. Everyone was on best behavior with family dynamics
>coursing irrationally underneath.
>
>The grandmother, Ella, who had a hip replaced six weeks earlier, spent
>her whole time in the kitchen cooking. I interacted with her only at
>dinner, and everytime I asked her a question, Herb answered. I tried
>lowering my voice and asking her a question when Herb was talking with
>someone else, but he heard and left one conversation for another. Ella
>gazed at me at one point as Herb was answering a question only she could
>answer, with eyes that spoke not of tolerance, frustration, or
>consciousness of sexism - no, they spoke of love, a love tinged with a
>bit of resignation. I saw the love when her eyes turned from me to
>Herb. I will take that shift in eyes with me to my grave - so much was
>expressed.
>
>Now I don't mean to imply that that the metaphor or parallel is real in
>any way to that of Mr. and Mrs. Switchback. However, we have heard
>nothing from the distaff side of the equation, and have to wonder if
>Mrs. Switchback is silently loving her man, a purposive silence. She
>knows Mr. Switchback has a life on this forum and is perhaps glad he
>talks to us. Perhaps.
>
>The question for we curious minds who want to know - is, well, I'm not
>sure what it is. But it would be interesting to know the answer to what
>we want to know...
>
>Jeff, just Jeff, just playing around....
>
>
>>---------------------------------------
>>Switchback writes: Even though very few people on this List have met my wife, for some strange reason there seems to be much sympathy for her. She seems to have become sort of a legend in her own right. She does not even hike or is a Trail Pirate. That does not seem to be reasonable or logical that she has her own notoriety in the trail community. This puzzles me and is beginning to bug me. 
>> 
>>I bet her popularity is because she would have sympathy with the Female Terminator Leadership types. This group is limited to the advance prototype liquid metal models. Another good reason to keep her away from the hiker community and any negative propaganda.
>> 
>>Thoughtfully, Switchback - Rascal of the Trail
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