[pct-l] Re PCT-l: How do you distinguish scuzzy ''Hiker Trash'' from a grubby ''Homeless Bum''?

[Hiker97]

Unsupported writes: Say Switchback, I saw a ''Homeless Bum''  at McDonald's  the other day looking for a handout, so I bought him a hamburger instead of giving him money.  I always do that, this way they get something to eat instead of something to drink.  After I left I started thinking, ''funny'', I never saw a ''Homeless Bum'' with trekking poles before.....I wonder if he was ''Hiker Trash'' instead?.....They all look alike, kind off, ....grubby, scuzzy, dirty and malnourished.  Say, how  DO YOU  tell  "grubby ''Hiker Trash''  from a cuzzy ''Homeless Bum??? 
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Switchback replies: You hardly cannot tell the difference.  Hiker Trash and Homeless Bums are almost one in the same.  One hits the trail and the other hits the Ripple.  That is about it.  If you see a Ripple bottle then you know you are dealing with a Homeless Bum.  Of course, you could have a Ripple Hiker Trash.  But that is very rare in my experience.  We Hiker Trash are hardcore backpackers.  We are always on the lookout for Female Leadership Terminators types.  They are our nemesis.  They want to stop our goof offs.  They always want us to be "busy" and "productive" and "attentive".  Remember, women have an endless need for romance.  And as any women will tell you, there is a BIG difference between occasional sex and meaningful romance if you will give her about 5 hours of your listening time to enlighten you.

Have you ever noticed how Hiker Trash always look like they are in a continual reststep no matter how fast they are hiking.  They always look like they are goofing off, but are covering 20+ trail miles a day.  Why is this?  This is only true of male Hiker Trash backpackers.  We men have a natural ability to goof off in almost anything we do -- it is a God given talent.  Even with hardcore mountainman backpacking.  Have you ever noticed when women backpackers are around, the men start trying to look energetic and active.  Like they are doing something -- anything, so long as the women will not bug them or start critiquing them.  I have seen this at Gatherings, Kickoffs, Rucks, and on the trail too.  It happens every time.  How many times have you heard these independent women say, "But you're the man," when something goes wrong or they want something.  I would be a millionaire if I had a dime for every time I have heard this.
  
Yes, give the Homeless Bums and Hiker Trash males a break -- cut them some slack  They are only doing their God given right to be free men and go their own way without any help, except the occasional handout of hot pizza and cold beer or Ripple from an understanding and approving male.