[pct-l] social interaction / dealing with disagreeable people...

[Tom Hudson]

Yes, that's the other thing I failed to mention.  Typed communication is
robbed of all the subtleties of oral communication, both in inflection and
in body language.  We try to overcome with emoticons, stylistic liberties,
and other affectations; but often a great deal of actual intent is lost in
expression when the communication vehicle is solely words.

So, in addition to the online proclivity towards confrontation, remarks
which are not at all meant to be confrontational are interpreted as such.
Furthermore, the net effect of this artifice is that subtle cues to indicate
intent are either magnified grossly out of proportion (a wry remark is
rendered as bitter sarcasm) or otherwise lost altogether (a wry remark is
rendered as dead seriousness).  In either event, something meant to be
friendly can be interpreted as either hostile or unreasonable.

Oh, why can't y'all just read my mind???

/Tom

On Tue, Jan 11, 2011 at 4:21 PM, Paul Robison <paulrobisonhome at yahoo.com>wrote:

> thanks all for the encouraging replies about this.  it really put me back
> in the
> right mood.  i'll just shrug off what happens on here,  adsorb the
> knowledge i
> can and try and see what to sift through.  as for actual trail interactions
> i'll
> just think on my 2010 experience and not worry about it.
>
> actually echo brought up that i often seem confrontation when i type so
> maybe
> it's the fact that emotions are readily read online as well.  so when
> someone is
> giving a contracy opinion, what would seem constructive in person ends up
> being
> inflammatory in interpretation.
>
>
> ~Paul
>
>
>
>
> ________________________________
> From: Scott Williams <baidarker at gmail.com>
> To: Gerry Zamora <gerry0625 at gmail.com>
> Cc: pct-l at backcountry.net
> Sent: Mon, January 10, 2011 12:45:59 PM
> Subject: Re: [pct-l] social interaction / dealing with disagreeable
> people...
>
> Good points Tom. And Paul, over the entire trip last year, I only met one
> person I didn't care to spend time with, and it was the constant
> stonedness,
> and centrality of drugs that was the issue for me as well, but none of the
> flaming rhetoric that occurs on the list.  I didn't meet anyone on trail
> who
> was a flat out asshole.  And bonding with others on trail was a wonderful
> part of the hike for me.  The morning might be spent talking music,
> philosophy, art, beauty, health, food, sex, politics, love, or be just
> quiet.  But the people and groups I hiked with, I really liked.  And it was
> no problem bonding with new folks when extra zero's or a different pace
> broke up a certain hiking group.  It was just great to get to know the new
> bunch.  Some, however, I traveled 1,500 miles or more with, and felt just
> as
> good about them at the end as at the begining.
>
> You and Echo are two people who will never have a problem picking up
> friends
> on trail.  That is clear to me from the begining sections we did together.
> Tom's points about the relative anonymity of email posts is spot on.  It's
> kind of akin to road rage, where the anonymity of not really having to look
> another human in the face, can bring out the real jerk in many people.
>
> Shroomer
> _______________________________________________
> Pct-L mailing list
> Pct-L at backcountry.net
> To unsubcribe, or change options visit:
> http://mailman.backcountry.net/mailman/listinfo/pct-l
>
> List Archives:
> http://mailman.backcountry.net/pipermail/pct-l/
>
>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> Pct-L mailing list
> Pct-L at backcountry.net
> To unsubcribe, or change options visit:
> http://mailman.backcountry.net/mailman/listinfo/pct-l
>
> List Archives:
> http://mailman.backcountry.net/pipermail/pct-l/
>