[pct-l] Solo Female - Leaving Boyfriend At Home

[Craig Giffen]

> The real thing to consider with a boyfriend, or even a spouse... if they aren't 
> going to support you in your dreams and you aren't going to support them 
> in theirs, then is this really the person for you?

[enthusiastic clapping from me, onlookers in coffeeshop appear nervous]

Yes, exactly.   When I told my wife that I wanted to thru hike the trail sometime soon (as kind of a ~20 year anniversary of my 94/96 hike) she was supportive.  In the past relationships I mentioned about wanting to travel by myself somewhere for a lot shorter amount of time and it well, didn't go so hot.  Thankfully I only had to spend a few more months in that relationship that could best be described as the last line in a Bruce Springsteen song, "God have mercy on the man who doubts what he's sure of".

It didn't sound like this person was telling you to not go, but if they are...remember there is someone else out there who will support you and your goals in life.  Don't sell yourself short.   Like someone else suggested, does this person have any goals of their own they would want to work on while you are gone?  Then it can be a positive experience for the both of you.

I have a friend who quit his well paying programming job to burn up his savings and spend a few years traveling around the US doing landscape photography.  He never had a girlfriend nor even tried because they could never understand him wanting to drive four hours, then snowshoe 5 hours through the night to the top of Crater Lake, setup his tripod and take a few photos and leave.  All of this just because the moon and weather just happened to be in some rare position. Yet, what happened?  He now has a girlfriend...she is a landscape photographer.

I also have a couple Australian friends who came to the US recently.  What did they do prior to visiting me?  The husband went to a Buddhist retreat center in the California mountains and meditated for 10 days.  The wife went to New York City, sang a lot of karaoke in gay bars, went to museums, and even ended up on an NPR game show.  They both said their time in the US had been "amazing".  Nadia comes in at the 1:35m mark:

http://www.npr.org/player/v2/mediaPlayer.html?action=1&t=1&islist=false&id=153548603&m=153548596

CG